I’m usually pretty hard on Albany City Commissioner Tommie Postell, but he’s finally proven himself to be a true genius. Last week, he announced that he plans to bring the “saggy britches” crisis to the forefront of Albany politics. He described the fashion faux pas as “disgusting” and “disrespectful”. The only real problem I see is that he’s not targeting all the other disgusting fashions that can be seen around town.
One that I think needs serious addressing is that of extremely large people wearing shorts that would make a Hooters waitress blush at the idea of wearing them. I’m a pretty large guy, at least as guts are measured, so I would be wrapped up in this myself. That said, I’m not the kind of guy to wear shorts at all, so I am really fine with this regulation.
After a weekend trip to the Department of Driver’s Services, I saw another area that needs to be addressed. Tight jeans are all fine and good, but several women I witnessed during the grueling trial to renew my driver’s license pushed the boundaries a bit. After all, if your jeans are so tight that I can identify the last time you shaved your legs, that probably qualifies as “disgusting” and “disrespectful” as well.
Alright, time to shift to the serious. Postell makes his suggestion in the same week that Mayor Willie Adams brought attention to the homeless population of the Artesian City. He made a call for local charities to try and help these people. Frankly, this is something that I find myself in agreement with our mayor on and urge everyone who reads this column to step up and help where they can as well. This is a serious problem, and one worthy of our efforts.
Saggy pants? Not so much.
As the mayor pointed out, we have too many homeless people. We have far too few jobs. This is a serious problem. Postell’s efforts for the week are, at best, a waste of time and resources. No one likes seeing these kids with pants hanging somewhere around their knees and a clear look of their boxer shorts. However, it’s not indecent in that we can’t see anything else. For all I know, they have another pair of underwear on under those boxers. They probably don’t, but I really don’t care.
Postell’s efforts come about shortly after Dublin passed a similar ordinance. However, just because someone else has passed a law doesn’t mean we should. This is the land of the free, not the land of the nanny. The term “fashion police” has always been a joke or insult against someone who was too hard on how others dress. Postell seems inclined to make it a something else.
However, what can we expect from the only commissioner who didn’t seem to see reason in deciding to go after Cutliff Grove and taxpayer’s money? He’s willing to waste taxpayer money there, so why should he care about wasting taxpayer’s money to go after a fashion statement that is gross and idiotic, but doesn’t display anything inappropriate?
So long as all the body parts are covered, we shouldn’t really worry too much about the rest. In time, these kids will grow up and realize how ridiculous they look. Honestly, that will be punishment enough. Think about how some of us feel about leisure suits or parachute pants, depending on your generation. Now amplify it by a factor of 100. Maybe it’s just me, but that will be sweeter than any fine ever could me.
Written by Tom Knighton. Read his blog at TomKnighton.com, as well as SWGAPolitics.com. A lifelong political junkie, Tom started out his adult life as a journalism major at Darton College before leaving school to serve his nation as a U.S. Navy Corpsman. Through the years, he has watched government from outside and inside. A former Reagan supporter, then later a Democrat, Tom now finds himself quite comfortable as a card carrying Libertarian and currently serves as Chairman of the Libertarian Party of Southwest Georgia.